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In 2018 learn about friendship, Jeffrey Hall, an associate professor of communication studies at the University of Kansas, found that it takes about 50 hours together to move from an acquaintance to an ordinary friend, 90 hours to call someone a friend, and more than 200 hours to be considered a close friend. Making friends takes time, but it is doable by combining old-school techniques and methods.
When my kids were little, it was easy to reunite with other parents. My kids asked me if I could match a friend, I prepared for play day, and often my parents and I became friends. Even after our children gored each other, we would often stay close.
A year after I divorced, I began a long-distance relationship with my husband who now lives in his hometown. Some of my childhood friends stayed in Kansas City, but with jobs, families, and personal responsibilities, it was very difficult to coordinate our schedules. I had to invent a new and more intentional way to make friends.
The usual method of gathering with others did not involve punching and kicking me, but I always wanted to defend self-defense, so I decided to combine my efforts. A week after I started training at Krav Magan, I made a few friends. I also learned a life-saving skill. Even two years after I left my hometown gym, I count some of my classmates among my closest friends.
I have maintained many long-term friendships, but one day I felt the need to expand my horizons and meet new people. Curious about the ways to make new friends, I asked the advice of the contact experts.
Determine what holds you back
Consider what prevents you from expanding your friends. If you have bad memories of an empty platonic relationship or are worried about not adapting, you are not alone. “We can give different names, for fear of not liking it or for fear of doing wrong or for fear of being judged,” says friendship expert Shasta Nelson, speaker and Friendship Business: Making the most of the relationships we spend most of our time with. “There’s a fear of being left out beneath it all. We don’t get there because we’re scared. “
Nelson warned that we felt more anxious as the pandemic progressed, as did those of us who were doing well a year and a half ago. “A lot more people are feeling anxious for health reasons, but we’re out of practice.” It’s hard to be cautious and charming after spending so much time during the pandemic on our own or with smaller groups. Instead, it is easier and more dangerous to rely on others to put them first.
Once you identify what’s holding you back, you can take steps to open up to new friendships. If you are looking for someone who shares a passion for hiking, games or saving, Get together it may be the perfect solution for you. Since its launch almost 20 years ago, this online and application-based service has helped connect more than 50 million people with similar interests, both online and in person.
Recognize that making friends can be challenging
“Friendship is supposed to be easy,” says Danielle Bayard Jackson, friendship coach and owner Friend Forward. This digital community provides training and events for women to promote platonic friendships. For some, the thought of being vulnerable to someone new can be paralyzing. “I think people are also scared to ask for help because they are afraid of what they look like,” he says. There is nothing wrong with seeking the help of others, especially those who are more external to you.
Start with you Facebook friends. You can create a Facebook group based on similar interests, parenting teens, or riding a bike. Then ask your current friends to invite them to join their contacts. Or you can join a group that encourages existing gathering. Grown and flying is an online resource Facebook community Over 194,000 members, where parents create subgroups to meet others in the same city.
Get to know each other and understand the difference between friends
You can have a lot of acquaintances while the people you see once or twice a year are socializing with others. Then there are significant friendships that require a more important commitment of time. “What we don’t want to do is spend all of our emotional energy investing in shallow relationships,” says psychotherapist Gina Handley and Friendship: Creating meaningful and lasting adult friendships. These are the final results of football or the weather you discuss. Handley stressed the importance of having friends who will be with you in difficult times. “You want people who show up with chocolate and wine to be with you when you’re in an emotional hole,” he says. These were the apps for women that experts sought the most friendship with Aupa Vina and Bumble BFF.
Consider the Health Benefits
Studies, for example was published in this Journal of Social and Social Behavior, show that socially connected adults are healthier and have a longer life expectancy than peers who spend more time alone. “Friendships are necessary, not for relationships and emotional, but for physiological support,” says Handley. “They can deny anxiety and depression.”
Don’t underestimate the mental benefits of hurting friends. They help us feel and see. “Our ability to not feel alone is tremendous to be someone you trust, someone who believes you support you.”
Know what to look for when you turn to technology to find friends
We are used to hearing about online dating, but there is still a stigma when it comes to finding deeper friendships through online resources. Bayard Jackson says I think we’re gathering the technology we need to make friends now. “It doesn’t make us lame or disabled or lacking in any way.” Instead, he thinks it’s wise to be comfortable using technology for friends.
Nelson values the value of any application or service as it encourages positive feelings when interacting online. The game seeks an element and a way to express gratitude to each other. An app can help us find friendships, but Nelson says we need to take responsibility for getting there, how we behave, and how far we continue with our friends.
Jumping from the Net to Real Life
When you plan to meet in person, there is always the risk of rejection. “We want to know that we like it, have fun, and be interesting,” says Bayard Jackson. There’s something scary about hoping to put in someone new and get them right.
However, someone needs to take the first step. Coffee or lunch is good to start with. Instead of watching a movie or play, you will have few opportunities to interact, consider your interests and go on an excursion or take an exhibition in a gallery. If you have both pets, meet them at a dog park. You can also make your first meeting less awkward by inviting other friends to join you for dinner or a drink.
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