How to make friends? This CoJ reader organized a Walk in Portland! – Wired PR Lifestyle Story

A couple of weeks ago, at a Jo Cup list of linksA reader named C. left this bold comment:

PORTLAND WOMEN! This is for you. I have been at PDX for over a year. I haven’t made a single friend. It’s hard. It’s wonderful. 30s, no kids. I like books, walking and running slow, exploring Target, discussing celebrity gossip at length, and I prefer hashbrowns over potatoes for breakfast.

Weather permitting (the forecast is showing the sun! ????????), my sister and I will be at the top of the stairs on Mount Tabor next Saturday, January 22nd at 11:30 am (you know where the loop starts). I’m going to wear a yellow hat.

Maybe we can guess, maybe this will be an awkward encounter that will be etched in our memories as the ‘story of the COJ meeting’. Who knows, let’s try it! If you want to join us and take a walk, cheer up 🙂

As Saturday approached, I kept thinking about the walk, and then I was in the mood to find out how it went!

So I contacted C., and here is his summary …

We’re done, Jo! ???? The PDX meeting was great. For starters, it was a wonderful day. The sun was shining! Omg, we all needed it. But even better than the weather: 26 people showed up! Do you believe that ?! I’m still amazed that not only with the size of the group, each woman had something special about her that would be a good friend ????

What I appreciated most was that we all knew how difficult it is to make friends. And yet, we were eager to show and test it! Each of us had to face some kind of challenge: a new environment, working remotely, raising children, growing up, re-starting, whatever. It’s no surprise that we’re all heading towards the CoJ; each is looking for a community to call his own.

Some readers may wonder how they can do it in their hometown. Here is my advice:

Step 1. Impulsively send a comment to the CoJ for a park meeting. Immediately think, “Did I really do that ?!” and close the browser. (The parks are where the group meetings are. They are free. People are easy to hear outside. Mothers can bring their own children. Dogs can come too! People can easily go if needed.)

Step 2. Start with a helpful “introduce yourself” game. Try not to say, “It’s so awful!” after the entry of each person. But it’s okay if you do, because none of us remember how to socialize in Zooms after 24 months. Turn on your phone for contact information.

Step 3. Start the walk. Go slowly, keep the path easy, pause to see the beautiful views. But more importantly, stop by one in the bathroom (my sister’s advice!)

Step 4. Then set up a group chat on WhatsApp or GroupMe, and ask each participant to send a brief information about themselves and a selfie as a reference.

Step 5. Put on a new friend!

How amazing is that? Thank you for your courage, C.! Readers, please suggest in the comments some neighborhood walks, if you like!

PS Seven tips for making friends with adults, the secret of female friendshipand 14 things to do with friends (excluding dinner).